Thursday 12 December 2013

The Daily Beast

If The Peace Talks Were A Movie


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Confused by the current frenzied round of Middle East diplomacy? Me too. Until I imagine it as a Hollywood movie.

Here’s my elevator pitch. Working title: A Foreign Affair. It’s a bit like When Harry Met Sally meets Knocked Up meets Dr Strangelove.

Doe-eyed but flint-hearted former Mossad lovely Tzipi (Meryl Streep) and chubby, eloquent but iron-minded Saeb (Danny DeVito) are neighbors and on-again, off-again friends/rivals. They are each happily married with their own families and there is no question of an affair—but that simmering tension provides a backdrop for the drama that follows. Saeb has threatened to leave the neighborhood before and has planted a For Sale notice in his front yard several times, but he keeps changing his mind at the last minute.

Along comes steel-jawed, helmet-haired, former war hero John (Clint Eastwood) and asks them to look after his love-child, Salaam, due in nine months. John will not be around much longer and so he must entrust the child to their safe-keeping. They each owe him big time for past favors and they cannot refuse his request.

Alas, neither Tzipi and Saeb, sadly, can have children of their own. This could be their one slim chance of parenthood. For their own reasons, they cannot afford to pass it up. There’s also a back story on each that we won’t go into—a violent past, lots of suffering, various disappointing father figures.

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